Deer in the Headlights

Searching for the truth is
ugly, frightening and dangerous
— and the only worthwhile choice
~ John Kaminski ~

Most of us have material for a pile of compost close at hand. We just don't realize it. Here, where I presently live, there is plenty of stuff to mix into the heap. It comes in the form of a person that I call 'Big Dog.' He is an itsy bitsy, teeny weeny, petty tyrant that has provided many lessons.

The Big Dog is quite interesting. He has a set schedule for everything. And I mean everything, right down to repeating the same words he speaks in the morning, afternoon and evening at the same time everyday. It's fascinating to see this in action. If his routine is upset he yells at the deaf dog that lives here. Actually, every morning he yells at the deaf dog for tossing about the sheet that covers the couch when she is asleep. I'm glad she can't hear him.

My little dog decided long ago that it was futile to stay in the same room with this noise and usually hides or, if I'm in the house, runs downstairs into the basement with me. The poor little guy has become a bit neurotic. He has never been yelled at and has a love/avoidance relationship with the Big Dog due to the fact that doggie cookies often come from him.

The newest action is ordering me to move out. This is fine. I've been looking for a place for over a year. The only problem is, here in the NE the rents for one bedroom apartments tend to start at 900 and go up from there. There is also the issue of finding a place that will accept a dog. Those rents are even higher. I guess too many people have had slobs for tenants.

The Big Dog is presently busy trying to get me to react. He has moved what little I have in the house downstairs to the basement and placed it in a pile on the floor. I'm going to thank him when I walk out the door for the last time. He saved me a lot of time and energy.

It's interesting to see what he didn't move. Anything that he wants to keep, even if It is part of my stuff, remains where it was last placed. This seems to affirm my notion that if he can use it or needs it, it is his. He does the same thing with people only on a different level.

The last time I was here, while my sister was still alive, he was in the process of shunning her. Shunning is the practice of treating a person as if they were dead. I happened to be present at a time when my sister did not fit into his notion of the universe; therefore, she did not exist. A few months later his wish came true.

Gurdjieff speaks of the mechanicalness of people and their Many I's which cause them to react based upon their changing impressions. Living here has been a wonderful lesson in learning about all of my own 'Little I's.' In fact, just the thought that I might not find a space has brought more of these 'Little I's' to the surface. Another reason to say thank you. It has been very educational, especially in resolving the grief over my sister's death, but it's time to move on.

Which brings me to the main reason for this entry. John Kaminsky has written an interesting essay, Deer in the Headlights, which discusses the Organic Portal and Psychopath. An exerpt:

Now, as many of you know, I tend to reject out-of-hand any contentions that we are ruled by supernatural forces, be they angelic or alien. In my simple mind, it just makes life too complicated. Yet, you must accept valid information where you find it, which is sometimes in unexpected places. And you can’t let your own paradigms and beliefs get in the way of hearing what you need to hear. The penalty for that is the ugly world we have now.

Over time, I have received many recommendations to check out a website that utilizes as its chief metaphorical theme communication with a group of extraterrestrials known as Cassiopaeans. Having seriously dabbled with many New Age subjects in the early ’90s and found the genre as riddled as the Patriot movement with creepy charlatans and egotistical psychos, I tend to dismiss such recommendations out-of-hand. But that is not to say it can all be dismissed in such a way.

When you look at the work of Laura Knight-Jadczyk and her physicist husband Arkadius, fast-buck operators seeking to harvest cash from seances is not what you see. I’m not sure that sending you to Adventure Index is the proper way into their insightful milieu, but it’s the way I went in. And I have no intention to commenting right now on the validity of the worth of their Quantum Future School or perceptions that are beyond the grasp of my own, but what I did find in their site at this very link — Organic Portals — was a fascinating examination of the nature of psychopathy, which in my mind bears very directly on the situation we are all facing in this messed up world today.

I know this explanation is getting a little long, but bear with me. As you know, we all have been looking for a way to explain the behavior and the rude and rapacious men who run our world, who are running it into the ground. They are not like us (or, they are not like me, I don’t know about you, really).

One of the more fascinating and enigmatic explanations of what is actually happening in the world today is put forth by British phenom David Icke, whose many books and lectures have posited that the powers that be are actually reptilian shapeshifters, cold blooded in the truest sense. Many people find that assertion preposterous, and turn away. I’ve always related to it in a metaphorical sense, and in any case respect Icke for being one of the bravest men in the world for even attempting to tackle problems in the way he does.

But given my queasy uneasiness with such fanciful interpretations, I sometimes feel choosing to go to this level can be a distraction from the problems themselves. Not so with Laura Knight-Jadczyk’s explanation — the mask of sanity. And the assertion of the Quantum Future School that the official culture in America is a natural state of psychopathy. Hey! You only need to read a newspaper that the assertion is true. I highly recommend this information. Go to Psychopath.

But let me first synopsize my understanding of it, and tell you about the event that triggered Waco, because it bears on the tragedy and disappointing drive to unearth the truth about Oklahoma City. (I know this is convoluted; thank you for your patience.)

From one of Laura’s reviews of a book titled “The Mask of Sanity” by Hervey Cleckley comes this description:
... a person who is able to mimic the human personality, but who leaves the impression that something is not there. They have a personality structure which “functions in a manner apparently identical with that of normal, sane functioning” and yet when all is said and done, “we are dealing here not with a complete man at all but with something that suggests a subtly constructed reflex machine which can mimic the human personality perfectly” to the point that “no one who examines him in a clinical setting can point out in scientific or objective terms why, or how, he is not real.”

In my own search to identify who some have called “biorobots,” I find that when Knight-Jadczyk draws upon the work of Cleckley and the Russian exile Boris Mouravieff and labels half the human population “organic portals,” or people without souls, she is right on target in explaining why the newspaper headlines are the way they are these days, or have always been.

I know. It should come as no surprise to me that people don’t always do the right thing. But this line of investigation strikes me as the way to actually fix the problem, for all you out there who frequently suggest I complain too much and don’t do enough about proposing solutions. Understanding this concept is definitely the beginning of a solution to why the human race seems hellbent on destroying our planet.

Well, it certainly makes sense to me.

BTW, I have no idea what lives in this house. To begin to label people is just another form of bigotry and would, I think, stem from the very same 'Little I's' that control most people. All I know, from objective observation, is that the Big Dog, like so many others, is an angry and confused man who only seems to respond, as Gurdjieff would say, to "what he likes and what he does not like." On leaving I will wish him well and thank him for the most excellent lessons he has provided.

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